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Pages pages. Subjects Behavioral Sciences. Export Citation. Get Citation. Birchard, T. View abstract. The most important part of resolving the problem, is being motivated enough to change. Having motivation to not only stop the drinking or drug taking, but making changes that will affect whole lifestyles and friendships. Identify the factors that help keep the problem going.
Then you can look at each factor and try to make changes in each. You may need help for some of them - so look for the best and most appropriate person or organisation to get that help from. Doing things Differently. Thinking Differently. Pause, take a breath visualise the sign if it helps.
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What am I reacting to? What have I been thinking about here? Am I getting things out of proportion?
How important is this really? How important will it be in 6 months time? What would be the consequences of doing what I normally do? Am I expecting something from this person or situation that is unrealistic? What's the worst and best that could happen?
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What's most likely to happen? Is this fact or opinion? Am I using one of those unhelpful thinking habits? Am I seeing things through that negative filter? Those gloomy specs? Is there another way of looking at it? What's the helicopter view? What advice would I give to someone else in this situation? Am I spending time ruminating about the past or worrying about the future?
What could I do right now that would help me feel better? Am I putting more pressure on myself, setting up expectations of myself that are almost impossible? What would be more realistic? Am I jumping to conclusions about what this person meant? Am I mis-reading between the lines? Is it possible that they didn't mean that?
Applied Psychology, no. 27
What do I want or need from this person or situation? What do they want or need from me? Is there a compromise? Am I just focusing on the worst possible thing that could hap pen? Is there another way of looking at this?
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Am I exaggerating the good aspects of others, and putting myself down? Or am I exaggerating the negative and minimising the positives?